Throughout my parenting journey I have come across so many people who choose to parent with kindness, empathy & respect towards their children because they weren’t treated that way by their own parents. Most people I’ve come across say they knew when they were growing up, they promised themselves that they’d parent their children differently. Some have had lightbulb moments, expecting to parent the same as they’ve been parented and read something or discovered something that made them stop & think differently.
The more I hear about people’s parenting experiences as a child, the more I feel incredibly fortunate. I am fortunate because my mother parented me in such a compassionate & empathic way, and because that’s what she thought was right, because that’s how her mother had treated her & my uncle - because that’s what she knew and it felt right. Growing up I have a very patchy memory but I do remember my childhood being filled with love and adoration! I was always treated as a valued member of the family and when I was a teenager we would always ‘talk it out’ and compromise - I always felt listened to and respected. When I became a parent, my parents joined me on my journey, always eager to learn more, discover different ways and the reasoning for it - they were fascinated! My mum even bought ToddlerCalm to read one year whilst she lay on a beach and couldn't stop telling me about it.
Parenting is such an emotive topic, a rollercoaster but the best journey I’ve ever embarked on and I’m blessed that I’ve been able to take my parents along for the ride.
This is my story of how I came to parent the way I do. There will be more from us on this, hear different consultants tell their story.
Danielle Heap - Director of Community -CalmFamily CIC